EYES ONLY: This document will self-destruct after reading. (Just kidding, it's the internet. Nothing ever really goes away.)
We know you're interested in espionage, have questionable decision-making skills, and probably look great in a trench coat. Beyond that, we collect:
To contact us, simply speak your message aloud in an empty room. We'll get back to you via a cryptic message in tomorrow's newspaper classifieds.
By using our site, you agree to these terms. If you don't agree, well, this message will self-destruct in 5... 4... 3...